Monday, September 20, 2010

Update on Children

We seem to get quite a few questions about how are the twins doing and what do they think about adopting D. It has happened so quickly but now we are having time to really digest everything.

The twins at first were so excited. They were thrilled to death that D was going to be a part of the family. I think they were shocked as to how the other 3 children excepted the idea as well. As I look back in the last two months, the twins have actually settled down more with the family. Now that doesn't mean they weren't attached but I kind of think, they are thinking "We are really here to stay".

The first year of the twins coming home was challenging with the fact the twins thought they were just living with us to go to school and someday they would return back to their family. Like they were our guest. They thought this because of a couple of comments their birth family said to them when we met them to say "good-bye". What their birth family said to them wasn't bad or anything but I can see what and how they misinterpreted what they said.

So now, the twins have actually "settled" down with more trust and believing they are a part of the family. The decision to adopt D has also brought out some insecurity with them. Interesting conversations have occurred like..."Mommy when D gets home - will you ever give us away?" "Will you ever give D away?" We have talked so much about why their birth mom had to give them up to another family. We have talked about how amazing she was to do this because only the strong moms can do this. Also, we have talked about just because their birth mom can't take care of them doesn't mean she doesn't love them.

I have taken them outside to show them the moon and explain to them, we all share the moon. So when they look up at the moon it's the same moon their birth mom sees.

So as I think about this new journey our family is going on, it is such a great lesson for security, trust, and more love of the twins and for the twins.

I know when D comes home, there is going to be a lot of grieving on both sides because of the change of the family. I am so amazed as to how excepting all the children have been to this new person who is going to join us. They talk a lot about ....when D gets here, can we......?" The twins have already planned out the dinner from when D comes home for the first night.

On the updating side of what has occurred so far is we have had our home study visit and now we are waiting for it to be sent to court to get certified to adopt. In Arizona, it's one of those extra steps we have to do. The next step is to send over our dossier. We will do that the minute we pick up our home study. It's mostly ready but I have dragged my feet a bit more because I have been working on something else for Ghana. Anyway, that's about where we are!

Saturday, September 4, 2010


When we decided to begin this adoption, Jarett was concerned with how we were going to do this because we don't have the money. Meaning, we didn't plan this so we didn't have a savings started for it. We could save for it but it would take a long time to gather the funds. D is already 12 years old and soon to be 13 so we want to get her home as quickly as we can. Plus, she has been separated from her sisters for 3 years now. Well, I told Jarett that if this was really God's plan for us, He would provide the money.


With our first order of the candle sales, we made enough money to pay for the home study and have a little extra left over. We are going to put the extra money towards the lawyer fees now (that's our next challenge besides plane tickets).

You think you have faith until you really run into a challenge and then your faith is tested. Both Jarett and I have failed this test. I started off strong with faith knowing God would provide for this adoption. He always has but as I think of all the things we need to pay for, I begin to are we going to do this next stage? I wonder sometimes if this is Satan putting those doubts into my head. I just have to keep my eyes forward knowing God is going to get us to the next phase and that this is all in His timing.

I do have to say that involving the children in the candle sales was such an amazing experience for them. It made them feel so involved in this adoption process. When we adopted the twins, our biological children would say "When YOU adopt the twins......". Now the children, including the twins, say "When WE adopt D.....". They have ownership in this adoption. I think it will make the transition of when D comes home so much more meaningful. We also have a Chick-Fil-A night set up and they are so excited for it. I think God is really proud of them to have the compassion for this adoption. I know Jarett and I are very proud of them!